23 years later.....

"Weather man said it’s gonna snow
By now I should be used to the cold.

Living alone here in this place
I think of you, and I’m not afraid
Your favorite records make me feel better
Cause you sing along
With every song
I know you didn’t mean to give them to me

But you went away
How dare you?
I miss you
They say I’ll be OK
But I’m not going to ever get over you

It really sinks in, you know, when I see it in stone"

-Over You (Miranda Lambert)


23 years ago the most important man I have ever known left us. My grandfather is the reason I am who I am. He was a hard worker, he was a hero, he taught me to be compassionate and to always believe in the good. I am sure he had his flaws, but at 8 years old I couldn't tell you what they were. I have spent every day since December 19th, 1989 trying to make him proud. Most people who know me know that I do not know my biological dad. I have a great man who has been my father for 23 years now, however, my first "Dad" was my grandfather. He was my everything as a child, his outlook has been what I have based my life on. My fondest memory was the day that he pulled me aside and told me "Amber, there is good everywhere, you just have to find it." He would point out "The good" to me when we were certain places. Even to this day I alwasy look for the "good" in any situation I am in, I can't help it, it's ingrained in me. I could go on and on, but, I'm trying to not break down and cry, I've done that enough today.......

I will say, I didn't know it at 8 years old, but I was blessed to have even just one day with this man. I am blessed to say everyday that I am Harry Claude Searles' granddaughter. I was cherished and loved by an amazing man and everyday I cherish his memory and legacy that continues to live in me. I Love You and I miss you everyday.